I Forgive You: A letter to my younger self

                                           Life is like photography; You use the negatives to develop.  



Dear younger Zeena,

                            You have been through a long road. Things have not been easy, but you've survived and made it through alright. You have been through ups and downs, and just when the world thought you would be shattered, you overcame the obstacles of life and became even stronger.

   I FORGIVE YOU

 For all the times you should have been thankful for every single thing your parents did for you, but were not, I forgive you. I understand you were not fully at fault. After all, you grew up as Daddy's little princess: a girl who led a luxurious and comfortable life, unaware of the struggles and hard work her parents went through just to keep a smile on her face.Starting your morning with bed tea, having Dad wait for hours to pick you up from private coaching and drop you home safely and having Mom work in the kitchen an entire day just to cook your favorite meal were but normal to you. However, if you had taken the chance to look beyond your own needs and wants, you would have realized you were truly blessed to have the best parents in the world: parents who would sacrifice their own needs and do anything just to make you happy.

 For all the times you chose your phone over your family members, your virtual connections over the real ones, I forgive you. Technology has taken over every aspect of people's lives, to such an extent that they love talking to people they haven't met in person, but cannot spend quality time with their relatives. They find peace and entertainment by logging in to YouTube to watch videos or play games, but never bother to ask their siblings how their day has been at school.

I guess you were just one of the 'cool teenagers'. How I wish you realized that the moments you took for granted were the ones which would occupy the most space in your heart in the future, that your family members would not always be around you and someday, you would deal with the struggles of life on your own. I wish you understood long ago that God would need the people He gave to you back, so you had to cherish them as long as they were alive and make wonderful memories to last forever. If only you made the effort of making the people around you feel appreciated and loved, you would not feel somewhat empty today. 

 For all the love and respect you should have given to yourself but gave to the wrong people, I forgive you. You were full of so much love and kindness to give to the world, and that made you special. Nevertheless, you should have known that not every person would love you for who you were and not everyone who smiled at you was your friend. Expecting people not to hurt you just because you do not hurt them is like expecting a lion not to eat you just because you don't eat it- it makes no sense.

But how could you have known? You grew up in a paradise island among people who only loved you. You had to experience hatred, persecution and pain to learn that you were completely okay all by yourself and were stronger than you thought. I wish you respected yourself enough to walk away from the wrong guy the very first time he disrespected you, and not wait for him to cheat on you. I wish you did not blindly trust the fake friend who always tried to bring you down because she had no standards and all she had in mind was to use you for her own selfish motives. I wish you loved yourself so much that you did not have to look for happiness and love in someone else. I wish you didn't try to please everybody or bother about their opinion of you and realized way earlier that you were the only one to control your life.

 You have locked yourself in the room, cried yourself to sleep, suffered and learned from those mistakes. You fell down, rose again, moved on and did not look back in life. Your looks and personality have transformed and you turned into a strong, beautiful woman: a woman proud of her scars- scars that are proof to the fact that she was wounded, yet stood strong and survived everything with a smile; a woman who lost her trust and was knocked down but still worked hard, earned the respect of those who once did not believe in her and now walks with her head held high.

 Above all, I admire you for who you are. You've been through tough times but your smile did not change. You still have love and kindness to offer to those who can do nothing for you. You are special, perfect with all your imperfections and never let anyone make you doubt it.

I love and respect you.

Sincerely,

The New You.